There is something to be said for becoming depressed over the amount of prescriptions and the number of doctor’s visits one person can be subjected to.
I am currently taking one prescription 3x a day for my PCOS.
I am taking 3 other separate prescriptions at any given point in my monthly cycle to try to help me become pregnant, or at the least help my cycle be somewhat regular.
I am also taking 2 prescriptions for my post root canal treatment recovery – once of them is 3x a day and the other is 5-6x a day.
I am also taking high dose Percocet for pain, and OTC pain meds to reduce inflammation.
In addition to this, I am seeing a Chiropractor 3x a week to treat my pinched nerve, as well as acupressure for helping fertility.
I also see my Reproductive Endocrinologist 2-3x a month to monitor my cycle.
Each time I am subjected to invasive procedures.
This is all in addition to school and 2 part-time jobs.
Wednesday night I was in intense pain and dizzy from my root canal in addition to an overly swollen left side of my face.
Yesterday, I was home all day – alone for the most part – crying and feeling very depressed. I was also extremely dizzy and nauseous (I vomited) and that left me bed ridden for the most part.
Today, my pain is less so, but the swelling is just as bad. I can hardly eat because I can barely open my mouth. I can’t lay on my left side because the slightest pressure to my left cheek hurts so much.
My dentist’s office is not returning my calls because they’re closed and I am not considered an emergency.
I had one friend offer to visit me, but I was feeling too nauseous to receive her visit.
I am not trying to complain.
I understand His grace is sufficient for me.
But if we’re being honest, sometimes it takes a concentrated effort to remember that.
I am just tired of doctors and medication I have to remember to take and feeling sick or nauseous and dizzy and otherwise not myself.
I don’t need speeches about greens smoothies or Paleo diets or any other natural things.
I believe in their efficiency, but I haven’t found them to be cures as much as preventive healthy therapy.
I don’t need monologues about “faith-based healing” because I have faith that God can heal me and relieve me of my symptoms.
I have prayer for this and God has chosen to allow me to endure these trials so that I might draw closer to Him and rely on Him for my help.
I just need to feel His arms around me.
I need to feel hope.
I need it sooner than later.
Okay, I am done venting now.
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